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To Doomsday or to Not Doomsday

4 May

I have been told the end of the world is coming…  And to that, I know what my grandmother would say, “They said the end of the world was coming my entire life and it never did.”  My grandmother has since passed away at eighty-seven years young.  And her words are what I have held on to for most of my adult life when “the shit’s about to hit the fan”.  A phrase that all doomsdayers seem to quote as the raison d’etre.

As a teen, the threat of nuclear war loomed.  My dreams were riddled with sirens and obliteration.  Then there was the Y2K bug which, I must admit, I stashed a fair amount of non-perishables and water, just in case.  I found myself later eating through cases of cans of Dinty Moore stew and Little Debbie sweets.  More recently, there’s been the Middle East “conflict”, 911, major floods, tornadoes, earthquakes.  The tsunami in Japan.  All “signs” of our imminent demise, right?  I’m not convinced.  Well, if you are also not convinced, then you must not be online, reading the paper or listening to the fear on the streets.  December 21st, 2012 is the end of the world as we know it.  The Mayans knew it.  And now we will have to live through it.

Now most of us know that the Mayan calendar merely starts all over again and is cyclical so the end of days is really just the transition to the beginning of the calendar again or as some like to call it, “the Galatic New Year”. Some like to believe that this “new age” signified by December 21st will bring harmony, community, and love to our much deficient present version of the world.  A return to the feminine.  A new era of hope.  But being a Librian, the lady with scales measuring each side with equal intent, I can say with a fair amount of certainty that December 20th I will be devising an escape route and meeting destination with my family.  Just in case.

let them eat cake

25 Aug

the start of the academic year at a certain college in massachusetts is next week and the students are already here in full force. it is a low-level chaos  chaperoned by over-animated parents whose attitudes range from terror to hysterical happiness to overbearing mastery (don’t worry kids, we want to punch the more obnoxious of them in the face just as much as you do. or should).

for the most part, though, the kids could give a shit. there’s caution tape blocking off the walkways so cars can inch along to the various dorms in the yard. for those of us who have places to be or at least know where we are going, this is the day to learn patience.

on such an anarchic morning walk to work, who is there to save the day but little debbie in the form of two smiley young people passing out individually wrapped bits of chemical sweetness (and if you know me, then you know how genuinely psyched i am when faced with free sugary-crappy food).

after all, a cloud cake by any other name will still taste as sweet as a twinkie.